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Medical gaslighting – what is it, and how to avoid it?

Doctors have a long history of ignoring patients’ symptoms and complaints. In MS, this phenomenon tends to affect the so-called ‘hidden’ symptoms and related problems that are difficult to treat. 

Key points

  • Medical ‘gaslighting’, where healthcare professionals (HCPs) dismiss or downplay a patient’s symptoms, is an issue that patients and HCPs should be aware of. It affects women more than men.
  • Safety-netting is a legitimate strategy whereby the HCP and the patient adopt a wait-and-see approach to avoid over-investigation and overdiagnosis. It is part of a shared decision-making process and should not be interpreted as gaslighting.
  • Medical gaslighting can be subtle, but useful strategies exist for detecting and avoiding it.
  • If you are being gaslighted, despite efforts to push back, don’t be afraid to make your healthcare system aware of the problem rather than suffer in silence.

A case scenario

Whenever I see my neurologist, he seems to fob me off as if I don’t have a problem. He disagrees with me when I tell him that my MS is getting worse. He tells me I am not getting worse as my MRI is stable and my neuro exam is unchanged. He doesn’t believe me when I tell him that I am becoming more forgetful and that my fatigue is affecting the quality of my work.  

Origin of the term ‘gaslighting’

The volume of medicolegal case studies where doctors have ignored patients’ symptoms and complaints illustrates the extent of a problem that is now being referred to as medical gaslighting. Medical gaslighting may occur if:

  • your symptoms or concerns are dismissed of ignored without cause
  • your symptoms are dismissed as being normal, without explanation
  • you are made to feel your healthcare provider is blaming you.

The term ‘gaslighting’ comes from the 1944 film Gaslight starring Ingrid Bergman. The movie tells of a man who manipulates his wife to such an extent that she begins to doubt her own sanity. Since then, the term gaslighting has been used to describe emotional abuse that makes someone question their version of reality. People are beginning to share their personal experiences of medical gaslighting on social media with the hashtag #medicalgaslighting. 

Prevalence and severity of medical gaslighting

An article in the British Medical Journal (BMJ) suggests women are more likely than men to suffer from medical gaslighting, particularly with ‘health problems such as endometriosis, fibromyalgia, and irritable bowel syndrome’.1 Worryingly, the article states: ‘when compared with men, women face longer waits to be given a diagnosis of cancer or heart disease’. The article goes on to imply that medical gaslighting is becoming more common and the term has been ‘used widely in connection with long COVID, particularly early on in the pandemic’, when some patients who were still experiencing symptoms months after infection with SARS-CoV-2 thought they were not treated seriously or investigated fully.

A short online survey I did among MS-Selfie readers in 2022 revealed that 88% of 423 responders reported being gaslighted.

Responses to the survey question, ‘Have you ever experienced medical gaslighting in relation to your MS?’ (based on results from 423 MS-Selfie readers).

I am probably guilty of medical gaslighting too; in some cases, this may be deliberate. Many patients come to me with pages of problems, and I simply don’t have the time to deal with all of them. Time, or more correctly, lack of time is therefore one reason for medical gaslighting. Another is lack of knowledge or experience and not being able to admit you don’t know. However, the most worrying reason is the power dynamic, with HCPs wanting to be in control or remain in control. 

MS-Selfie as an initiative tries to address this power dynamic by giving you useful information to self-manage your MS – or at least to ask the right questions

Safety-netting

I suspect safety-netting may be misinterpreted as gaslighting. Safety-netting describes activities both within the HCP consultation and at healthcare systems levels (diagnostic and treatment algorithms) to avoid over-investigation and overdiagnosis. Many symptoms are non-specific and because of uncertainty the HCP and the patient adopt a wait-and-see approach. The patient is given clear instructions on how to identify the need to seek further medical help if their condition fails to improve, changes, or if they have ongoing concerns about the problem. Safety-netting is considered good clinical practice. A recent BMJ article2 on safety-netting makes the following points:

  • Aggressively treating or investigating all patients with early undifferentiated illness is poor medical practice and can be harmful.
  • Time is an important diagnostic tool but creates a period of uncertainty and risk for patients with serious underlying conditions.
  • Safety-netting can help mitigate this risk, and a traffic light framework provides a structure for delivering safety-netting advice.

The point about safety-netting is that it needs to be done as a part of a shared-decision making process and it should therefore not be interpreted as gaslighting. 

How to identify and tackle medical gaslighting

A New York Times article on medical gaslighting warns that it can be subtle, and lists some red flags to watch for.3 

  1. Your HCP continually interrupts you, doesn’t allow you to elaborate and doesn’t appear to be an engaged listener.
  2. Your HCP minimises or downplays your symptoms, for example questioning whether you have pain.
  3. Your HCP refuses to discuss your symptoms.
  4. Your HCP will not order key investigations to rule out or confirm a diagnosis.
  5. You feel that your HCP is being rude, condescending or belittling. Your symptoms are blamed on a mental problem, but you are not provided with a mental health referral or screened for such a problem.

Now that we have recognised medical gaslighting as a significant problem in MS, please don’t allow a neurologist to gaslight you. The New York Times article suggests practical steps you can take to prevent this. 

  • Keep detailed notes and records. Patient-held notes transform consultations and force you to become a partner in your healthcare.
  • Record the consultation. Many HCPs don’t like this; just tell them you must listen to the conversation again to ensure you don’t forget things or miss important information. You will be surprised how this changes the HCP’s behaviour. 
  • Ask questions. Then ask some more. And don’t be fobbed off; if you are dissatisfied with the answer, ask the question again. 
  • Take someone with you for support. Having a witness during the consultation has a similar effect to recording the conversation or documenting it with notes. 
  • Focus on your most pressing issues to make the best use of your consultation time. If your HCP is pressed for time, say you understand, but you would like to prioritise the following issues today. This helps you to frame the limits of the consultation and promote a two-way discussion. Also, don’t expect the HCP to have all the answers at their fingertips, but do expect them to come back to you later with the answers.
  • Try and pin down the next steps for your problem; ask what the action points are. For example, if the MRI shows this, how will that change my management? Do I need further investigations? How soon should I switch treatments?

If you are still being ignored, here are some of your options.

Get a second opinion and ask to switch to a new HCP
Look to support groups or forums. Many MS charities have helplines where you can discuss these issues
Appeal to a higher authority, the person above your HCP (their line manager). In the NHS, we have a straightforward procedure for patients to complain or question their care. It is called PALS (Patient Advice and Liaison Service)

Some courses of action open to you if you experience medical gaslighting.

Abuse, manipulation, gaslighting and delaying a diagnosis are potentially reportable events which HCPs need to know about. Therefore, make your healthcare system aware of the problem rather than suffer in silence. 

Healthcare systems and the medical professions

We need to include medical gaslighting as part of the medical curriculum so that HCPs are made aware of it during their training. HCPs must buy into the model of patients being equal partners in the diagnosis and management of their disease. The paternalistic or older patronising model of healthcare where the HCP knows best is outmoded.

Gaslighting is another form of abuse or discriminatory behaviour, no different from sexism, racism or ageism. This raises the question, is it deliberate or an institutional problem, i.e. part of the dominant medical culture? I suspect the latter, and this is why it will need a wider campaign to tackle the problem, with clearly defined carrots (incentives/rewards) and sticks (disincentives/punishment) to change our behaviour. 

References

  1. Wise J. Sixty seconds on . . . medical gaslighting. BMJ 2022;378:o1974.
  2. Edwards PJ et al. Safety-netting in the consultation. BMJ 2022;378:e069094.
  3. Caron C. Feeling dismissed? How to spot ‘medical gaslighting’ and what to do about it. New York Times, 29 July 2022.

What should I expect during the diagnostic consultation?

The practice of neurology and medicine varies worldwide, so I will explain what to expect if you were to consult me. 

Key points

  • The principles of diagnosing MS are to show the dissemination of lesions in space and time and to exclude alternative diagnoses that mimic MS.
  • Diagnosing MS takes time and should not be rushed; do not be afraid to ask questions.
  • Most patients diagnosed with MS have an emotional response similar to the five stages of grief – Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance (DABDA). Additionally, many patients experience Anxiety about the future (DABDA+A).
  • Newly diagnosed patients should avoid overloading themselves with information about MS; much of the online information can be misleading and anxiety-provoking. Guidance is provided below about reliable information sources.
  • Counselling, cognitive behavioural therapy and the support of an MS ‘buddy’ can help patients adjust to a diagnosis of MS, which is a serious condition and should be respected.
  • You should be aware that medical ‘gaslighting’ may happen and know how to deal with it.

Tests to exclude other diagnoses

MS is a clinical diagnosis and a diagnosis of exclusion. Therefore, I would take a detailed medical and neurological history and examine you for neurological signs. Finding signs of involvement in a particular neurological pathway is important for fulfilling the criteria for dissemination in space. MS must involve at least two neuronal pathways. To be confident that no alternative diagnosis could explain your presentation, a full work-up will likely include magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) of the brain and spinal cord, evoked potentials, a lumbar puncture and blood tests. In addition, I would need to show dissemination in time, involving two or more structures separated in time by at least 4 weeks.

The diagnosis of MS is not trivial and should not be rushed. If I doubted the diagnosis, I would wait. The old maxim ‘time is often the best diagnostician’ is as pertinent today as it was in the past. Despite this, the misdiagnosis rate remains stubbornly high. I recommend you read some of the posts that cover the diagnosis of MS in more detail, such as Am I sure that I have MS? and Do I have active MS?

Time to adjust to a diagnosis of MS

You should not expect too much from the initial consultation. The second consultation, once all the diagnostic tests are back, will be the difficult one. Before COVID-19, an MS diagnostic workup in the NHS would take about 6 ̶ 8 weeks. Due to COVID-19-related delays in getting MRI scans and evoked potentials, it currently takes up to 4 months. Occasionally, patients with possible MS are admitted to the hospital because of a disabling attack. This allows us to make a more rapid diagnosis. 

Being diagnosed with MS or any other chronic and potentially disabling disease is distressing. In my experience, patients’ responses are highly variable, including relief about finally getting a diagnosis, surprise, shock, anger or blaming the messenger for the bad news. Some question my judgement and refuse to accept the diagnosis; they may accuse me of being wrong and seek a second, third or fourth opinion. Many are devastated and expect the worst: how long before I need a wheelchair? Rarely patients are uninformed, have little or no idea about MS and ask about the disease. 

Examples of some responses to a diagnosis of MS

I always try and be reassuring and tell patients that MS is now a treatable disease. If we manage their MS actively, we can prevent or at least delay the development of disability for many decades.

Emotional response

I also warn patients about the emotional reaction they will likely have to being diagnosed with MS. The psychological impact of an MS diagnosis and the uncertainty associated with having a potentially disabling disease should never be underestimated. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross in 1969 described five common stages of grief, best known by the acronym DABDA:

Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance

We have added an extra A – for Anxiety about the future – to expand this to DABDA+A. People diagnosed with MS may go through these stages in order of the pneumonic, but some will jump around, and others go through some stages many times. Although the Kübler-Ross stages have been criticised in the psychological literature, they provide a valuable framework for discussing a patient’s emotional journey. Being diagnosed with MS is a marathon, not a sprint, and it will take time to come to terms with it.

It is important for healthcare professionals (HCPs) to be there for the journey and to make sure that newly diagnosed patients have access to their MS team and high-quality information about MS. 

Step-wise approach to understanding MS

In the modern era, most patients I diagnose as having MS are aware of the disease and suspect they have MS before I tell them so. I say this because Dr Google, Dr ChatGPT and Dr Bing are only keystrokes away, and their answers are very credible. 

Because of their anxiety, most newly diagnosed patients only take away one thing from the consultation: they have MS.  Almost everything else they hear is forgotten. I encourage patients to record the consultation or bring a partner, friend or family member who can be their backup memory. 

I try to avoid overloading patients with information early on. Instead, I provide links to online resources about having MS. We arrange a follow-up session with the MS nurse specialist in the next 10 ̶ 14 days so that they can ask questions.

Guidance about what information to trust

I counsel patients to stay away from Dr Google, Dr ChatGPT and Dr Bing until they have come to terms with having MS. Much of the MS-related content available on the web is misinformation and disinformation; until you understand the disease, it is difficult to know what information is valid, reliable and helpful and what is quackery. Many patients ignore this advice and overwhelm themselves with information, which can worsen anxiety. 

I don’t introduce recently diagnosed patients to MS-Selfie initially. MS-Selfie is written at too high a level for the average person who is newly diagnosed. If patients want more information, I direct them to the MS Trust, the MS Society and ‘MS Brain Health: time matters’ (for more detail, see Resources and hot topics).  

Counselling, support and respect

Depending on a patient’s response to the diagnosis, we may refer them for counselling, cognitive behavioural therapy and/or mindfulness therapy to help them come to terms with having MS and to help manage their anxiety. Most patients are receptive to these psychological therapies. 

Many people with MS are traumatised by their diagnostic consultation and may experience symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder from the event. This should not happen in the modern era. In my experience, gestures such as having tissues on hand for a distressed patient or holding their hand are ways that HCPs can demonstrate their empathy.

On rare occasions, particularly for patients who are alone and socially isolated, we may buddy them up with another carefully chosen patient to ask questions and learn about MS. These MS buddies need to be optimistic, able to communicate well and not overwhelm the recently diagnosed patient with information. I work closely with the charity Shift.ms, which does a similar thing. 

In the diagnostic consultation, I avoid too much detail about treating MS and the specific DMTs. These are best discussed at the next visit. With some patients, however, the discussion gets to treatments very quickly. In such cases, I tailor the consultation to the individual’s needs. 

During the diagnostic consultation, I also show patients their MRI scans. Seeing your brain, spinal cord and MS lesions provides an objective way of helping you to visualise the disease. 

Recently diagnosed patients must be given time to ask questions and even to sit in silence. MS is a serious disease, and informing someone about the diagnosis must be done carefully. After more than 30 years as a neurologist, I still find telling my patients they have MS challenging. The patient being diagnosed with MS, as well as the disease, must be respected. 

What if a doctor belittles my concerns?

The term ‘medical gaslighting’ describes a scenario where health professionals dismiss or downplay a patient’s real symptoms, leading to an incorrect diagnosis. Now that we have recognised medical gaslighting as a significant problem in MS, please don’t allow a neurologist to gaslight you. There are things you can do to prevent this. 

  • Keep detailed notes and records. Patient-held notes transform consultations and allow you to become a partner in your healthcare.
  • Ask to record the consultation. Many HCPs don’t like this; just tell them you must listen to the conversation again to ensure you don’t forget things or miss important information. You will be surprised how this changes the HCP’s behaviour. 
  • Ask questions. Then ask some more. And don’t be fobbed off; if you are dissatisfied with the answer, ask the question again. 
  • Take someone with you for support. Having a witness during the consultation has a similar effect to recording the conversation or documenting it with notes. 
  • Focus on your most pressing issues to make the best use of your consultation time. If your HCP is pressed for time, say you understand, but you would like to prioritise the following issues today. This helps you to frame the limits of the consultation and promote a two-way discussion. Also, don’t expect the HCP to have all the answers at their fingertips, but do expect them to come back to you later with the answers.
  • Try and pin down the next steps for your problem; ask what the action points are. For example, if the MRI shows this, how will that change my management? Do I need further investigations? How soon should I switch treatments?

If you still feel that you are being ignored, here are some of your options.

Some courses of action open to you if you experience medical gaslighting.

Abuse, manipulation, gaslighting and delaying a diagnosis are potentially reportable events which HCPs need to know about. Therefore, make your healthcare system aware of the problem rather than suffer in silence.